Vacationer Humor Gifts

"I know we came in peace but these ones are already half cooked."

"Do we have to go to the beach? I think the airline mixed up my luggage."

"This hotel room must be dry. There's a cactus growing out of my suitcase."

Camping holidays in the British summer.

'Are we broke yet?'

Swearing and fighting in a caravan

Death Takes A Time-Share

Easter Island.

'I can't talk... I'm in the quiet carriage.' - '3...2...1...' - 'What? I can't hear you... you're breaking up...' - 'Brace! Brace!' - 'I said 'I'm in the quiet carriage'!!!' - 'Irony crash.'

'Next time, we set up camp during high tide.'

Dad helping to build sand castle while tent remains un-erected.

Get out of the kiddy pool Harold!

'Old fart and the sea'

'I'm going to give you an extra week of vacation just to see if we can get along without you.'

Excess Baggage: From the 'Travel Promises that never meant to be kept' department.

'This vacation has just come to a screeching halt - My pocket's just been picked.'

"Apparently our hotel is just a stone's throw from the beach..!"

'Public beach. Thong bikinis strictly prohibited. No butts about it.'

"O.K., who's the designated whiner?"

Gift shop in casino caters to winners and losers.

Schematic Map of Seaside Heights Town Beach, Summer, 2007

'Maybe now you'll admit that we're lost!?'

'I need a vacation after that fishing trip!'

SS Norovirus of the Seas.

". . . And if we all look to our left, we can see exactly what we saw an hour ago."

Southwest Hampton

A glass bottom boat.

My parents visited Turin and all I got was this lousy shroud.

Branch No3 is free sir: It will be $10...

Oh Bugger !

"It won't be much of a holiday for me, did you forget I'm a stripper?"

"Hammock"

Excess Baggage: Cruise passengers can come up with some pretty amazing questions.

'I went on a cruise and all I got was this T-shirt.'

The Leathery, Shapeless speedo sporter.