Vacation Humor Gifts

"Hammock"

"Do we have to go to the beach? I think the airline mixed up my luggage."

"This hotel room must be dry. There's a cactus growing out of my suitcase."

Camping holidays in the British summer.

"I know we came in peace but these ones are already half cooked."

'Are we broke yet?'

Swearing and fighting in a caravan

Easter Island.

'I can't talk... I'm in the quiet carriage.' - '3...2...1...' - 'What? I can't hear you... you're breaking up...' - 'Brace! Brace!' - 'I said 'I'm in the quiet carriage'!!!' - 'Irony crash.'

Dad helping to build sand castle while tent remains un-erected.

Get out of the kiddy pool Harold!

Maps to the house arrests of the stars

'Old fart and the sea'

'I'm going to give you an extra week of vacation just to see if we can get along without you.'

Excess Baggage: From the 'Travel Promises that never meant to be kept' department.

'This vacation has just come to a screeching halt - My pocket's just been picked.'

'Public beach. Thong bikinis strictly prohibited. No butts about it.'

"Apparently our hotel is just a stone's throw from the beach..!"

"O.K., who's the designated whiner?"

'You can't get there from here!'

Schematic Map of Seaside Heights Town Beach, Summer, 2007

Gift shop in casino caters to winners and losers.

". . . And if we all look to our left, we can see exactly what we saw an hour ago."

My parents visited Turin and all I got was this lousy shroud.

'I need a vacation after that fishing trip!'

A glass bottom boat.

Branch No3 is free sir: It will be $10...

Oh Bugger !

Lady has a cask of sea water sent back from the seaside

"It won't be much of a holiday for me, did you forget I'm a stripper?"

"The starfish doesn't want to stay on top of our Christmas tree!"

Excess Baggage: Cruise passengers can come up with some pretty amazing questions.

"Remember, we still have to complain about these beautiful sixty degree days when it turns seventy."

"This summer let's stay close to home."

'I went on a cruise and all I got was this T-shirt.'