Vacation Planning Season Gifts

"We haven't decided. At the moment, Stuart is researching Kennebunkport."

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

Santa Claus's Mail

'I'd say your caravan's a tad overloaded, sir.'

Invasion Of The Summer Aliens

"Hawaii, where are you folks going?"

Airlines

"First class, or with children?"

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

Grand Canyon. What's so great about the Grand Canyon?...Most of it's missing!

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

'Another expectant father looking forward to paternity leave.'

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

"Are we going for suntan, personal development or being the envy of our friends on Instagram?"

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

Fight or Flight

Daughters on the beach

'You can forget the Captain's table-we're not paying that kind of money just to eat with the crew!'

'How very Cumbria.'

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

"Let's see, I make it four suitcases, a rolling bag, and a tote bag... You sure that's enough for our two day trip?"

"Lets find another beach, this one has too much competition."

"Really! How many 'How to Survive the Festive Season' articles does one man need?"

Excess Baggage: In the old days folks called 2 weeks with 4 kids in a non-air conditioned car a vacation.

'My wife is going to kill me. All her shopping coupons are in that lost luggage.'

Bob's Marriage Advice: 'Geez, Bob. . . Now you're equating both marriage living in Florida to death?!!. . .Ah. . . so the restraining order by Disneyworld is still in effect?'

Camping.

"I'm afraid there'll be an excess baggage charge on your Filofax."

"I always forget how much louder they sound in the country."

A private jet takes off

"Cancel the trip. The cook didn't get a visa."

'...so if we can save enough maybe, just maybe, next year we'll be migrating courtesy of British Airways.'

'We would like an unspoiled paradise, but with lots of shops.'