Vacation Fan Gifts

'All the crabs you can eat, $1.00. But first you have to catch them.'

"Here's one: 'Youth Frisbee Camp', from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. on Tuesdays." "Naw... Go back to that first one, for 'early chewers', wasn't that one a sleep-over camp?"

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

Sunbathing in the park

"I won't be in today. I've decided to live off the land."

Canada's winter survival kit.

ATM withdrawal

'Um. . . I don't think that's a candy bar.'

Lei-ing Hens

Automatic swing machine

"Gilbert! Here's Mamma!"

'You're gonna love it son! We'll leave our homes for a few days and live in the great outdoors'

public toilet in the woods

"It's much cheaper than hotels."

Lemonade 5c Sugar Free: 'It sure is!'

On holiday...

"Don't you go worrying your head about the lack of sea view."

"Last weekend I went to Orlando for the DisneyWorld re-opening."

'No wonder you're more tanned than I am - you are nearer the sun!'

"If you can't see the sea I can recommend an optician in the High Street."

"I think our way is more elegant!"

'This is your passenger speaking. Where the hell is my coffee?!'

'LOL!'

'Good news, folks - no attack today!'

Grim Reaper Checkout

"I hope you don't mind. I only brought a picnic pillow for myself."

No Croquet

Caravan going one way, wheel going another.

Sausage

'Don't ask me why, but they always look tastier on the other side of the screen!'

'I'm not allowed in the water until I can swim.'

"I did my own research and now I'm strongly anti-fire."

If the dragon was romantic.

Daylight Saving

'Could you show me something in my price range.'