Urban Humor Fan Gifts

Starbucks

Cowboy posting notices saying WANTED...FOR FLYPOSTING

Ice cream van says 'STOP ME and buy one!' ? kid pulls gun and says: 'One 99 and a raspberry ripple Cornetto, please.'

"Genuine ASBOs for sale."

Cars.

We are a criminal-friendly community.

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

The Brothers Grime

10 K Tail-Chase

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

A man sees Zeus throwing lightning bolts on the balcony of his apartment.

"After the drugstore, I need you to find fresh parmesan."

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

The Snooze Bar.

Beer Parasol.

"I fell to the ground from a height of about two metres when I was born: My very first stunt!"

'Joe has been partying hard!'

"Well, you were late and her boyfriend didn't turn up for their wedding, so....."

No, I don

A dog on the sidewalk has a 'walk me' sign, begging for a walk.

1989 Map Of Sorghum Corners, Ohio

"My favorite part of the story was when Prince Charming kissed Sleeping Beauty and she totally rebooted."

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

'Trust me, you're not going to need an alarm clock.'

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

"I'm you from the future! Or the past. I've completely lost track of time."

'You're one of my kids? Really? I'm so sorry, I have so many it's hard to remember them all...'

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

tRUMp, Pirate President

Presidential surveillance ass!"

'It will be a difficult adjustment, but it doesn't mean you can't still live a full and rewarding life, say, in the library, or even a miniature golf course.'

"The lettuce I paid with was fresher than the lettuce I bought."

"Mom, are you sure I'm not adopted?"