Urban Humor Lover Gifts

Ban Bumper Stickers.

'You're in violation of Ordinance KT-25: digging for truffles without a permit.'

"After the drugstore, I need you to find fresh parmesan."

A man sees Zeus throwing lightning bolts on the balcony of his apartment.

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

'For Sale by Neighbor'

Unpopular Street Signs: Go, Please Litter, Yes Parking, Garbage Collection - Sometimes Never - Mon-Fri.

Sculptor explaining to tourist in Trafalgar Square that sculpture of pigeon is called 'Retribution - it actually doubles as a giant privy!'

"Do you think those clams we ate were a little off?"

Cars.

'You can come back in, King Kong. The superintendent got the door open.'

Straddling bus stop above a regular bus stop.

'You got much on at the moment?'; 'No, nothing really.' (Naked man)

"I've got to admit I'm not crazy about the freeway."

"You know, crime doesn't pay... at least at your level."

The Last of the Passenger Pigeons

'I really think you should check your pools, sir.'

"May I recommend the pumpkin seeds to starts?"

"The best way of dispersing crowds in the inner city is to start handing out job applications!"

Cowboy posting notices saying WANTED...FOR FLYPOSTING

Manhole Warning

'I don;t see how that's going to work?'

Cook complaining to milkman

"Call a veterinary, chief. I think he's got a kidney infection..."

Beggar with a sign that reads 'Need a rare 1905 Buffalo nickel to complete my collection- thanks!'

"It gets a lot of refracted light."

Laugh and the World Laughs with You, but Not on the I.R.T.

The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack Gets A Job

Chugger

"So we're agreed. You get everything south of 59th. We get the rest. Capice?"

"Genuine ASBOs for sale."

Plane annoys penthouse apartment.

Sign on sidewalk: 'Please direct your feet to the sunny side of the street...'

'It's Darwin's only chance to practice when he's in the city.'