Underwater Home Expert T-Shirts

Home 'Submerged' Home! (Home value less than mortgage).

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

Fish snorkling above water.

'Next Please...' (Joe's Sharpening Service).

Whale Shark Thoughts...

"You seem to be balancing your workload well."

'It's a long and narrow home: A perfect fit for you Mr Eel...'

Making fun of Starfish.

"It says it can be assembled by a 5 year old child - pop out and find me one..."

"Don't bother going that way: They've installed shark nets..."

clown fish

'I think he wants you to play ball!'

"Alright be cool. We're just gonna ask for an autograph and be on our way."

Castle Cellars: Bob's Basement Waterproofing

"Every year I lay a thousand eggs. Mother's Day rolls around, not a single card."

"It was an accident! How many times must I apologize?"

"I was so shy I hid to sound her out. When the echo came back, she sounded really good looking, and the rest, is history..."

"1 pinch of salt, 3 pinches of baking soda...oh dear, a cup of flour? How many pinches is that?"

"Gladys, look! My kids made me a card for Mother's Day!"

Dry Cleaning

"I live in dread of being mistaken for an undersea energy cable."

"Look at you! Dirty all over! I told you not to play with your ink!!"

A Clash Between an Octopus and a Diver.

'None for me...I'm trying to eat healthy.'

'My doctor told me to eat less fish.'

'Oceanographers go home'

"How long can you hold that pose?!"

"What's that clicking sound?"

"Nice, but it's still a fish bowl. We'd like something with a little more privacy."

'Frankly, I think we should stop trying to communicate with Humans: They're simply not smart enough to understand us'

"Me, I've traded mobility for living space and comfort...

'I'm not sure Dad, but I think I wet the bed.'

'You better take care of the bill quickly or there's going to be hell to pay.'

Deep Sea Tour: View the Sunken Wrecks

'Oh, mooom! Salesman-om-a-diving-trip again? Man, I'm really longing for the end of the holiday season!'