Unconventional Pet Enthusiast Gifts

'Perhaps you'd be happier with a dog!'

"Pick me!"

Welcome to the Team

"Okay, you both know the rules: no trash talk, no batting the other guy all over the house if he’s unconscious, watch the claws and nails..."

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

"As a friend, I pray you rest in peace. As a dog, I really want to dig you up."

Canine Companion

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

"Oh, yeah, that's the spot... just stay there... hurt so good... a little harder—yes! You are my hero, no kidding, I freaking love y-oooh..."

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

" 'Grrr' is not a word."

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

'That's not speaking, that's barking Try again'

Love Conquers All

"I don't know about you, but it always makes me feel kinda special."

"Did you get my tweet?"

"He also barks, meows and makes noises like a hamster."

"Watch out, Simone's hangry - her stomach AND her throat are growling."

Couple sitting in living room reading books while dog reads a book with a cat shaped cover.

'What was all that swerving at the cat walk?'

"What if, instead of the safe being filled with rawhide, it's filled with catnip and mice!" "No one will buy it." "Drugs and rodents? Who's our demographic?" "The Simpsons already did that."

"I could catch a bicyclist, well maybe not a bicyclist, but I could catch a jogger, definitely."

"He's already getting attached to you."

Pets.

"Look. They say sit, you sit. They say roll over, you roll over. Where's the prob?"

'Other dogs howl at the moon, I've trained mine to play Bach.'

'I bought him to retrieve my e-mails.'

Author's Bio-diversity.

"If you can’t beat ’em, roll around in their decaying carcass."

"The video of you eating my $700 John Varvatos got 300 'likes.'"

Sign at vet's says 'Cat's waiting area'. Cat says to dog with head in cone: 'Oi, mate, can't you read?'

'Now there's a vet that needs a holiday,'

A mime and his pet parrot talk to one another.

Pet Shop - Parrot labeled as 'Good Listener'

"The old tricks, young fellow, have served me well."