Funny Pet Enthusiast Gifts

"Don't worry. He's got unlimited minutes."

"Gone with the wind with cats" "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." "Me neither, who cares—let's take a nap."

"I'm down to only one nap a day. From 8 am t0 8 pm."

Grinning dog points at missing cat poster with glee

Cat mistakes bars for toilets.

Pet Entertainers

The First Cone of Shame.

Excuse me.. Are you Dog Friendly?

Feline Stand Up - 'Fetching...how dumb is that? And another thing I don't understand...what's with all that TAIL WAGGING?'

'I think he got embarrassed because of the sweater. . . Another dog started laughing. I told him it was just wheezing, but he wasn't buying it.'

"I'm thinking sixty nine."

'The last guy I worked for kept me on a short leash.'

Doggy conductor

Vet to owner about dog with bird at chest: 'I suspect heartworm.'

The Karate Kitten.

"You're back. Hold on … just give me a minute."

"I did what you asked and got rid of my white mice."

Dog Calenders.

'I'm worried about that dog's hearing,Doris.'

"FYI – your camel hair blazer started it."

'Kittens are cute, but I was thinking lion or tiger.'

"I don't think you fully thought out your escape plan!" "Meow..."

'It's about that lizard you sold me four months ago.'

"Did you know that cats aren't mentioned anywhere in the Bible?"

"If you'll excuse me fellas. I have to see a man about a dog. Specifically-this dog."

"I'll have the 'All you can eat from the menu, the kitchen, and the dumpster' special."

"Anatomy of a cat"

"I know I said, 'If there's anything I can do,' but I draw the line on licking your incision for you."

'Will Work For Food, The Take, Like, Two Bites And Walk Away.'

My dog is an honor student at the Curtis Obedience School.

"Well, perhaps 'guilty' is too strong a word."

'My hamster fell asleep at the wheel!'

'Well, would ya look at this, Martha? The dog's stealin' our cable. I told you this breed can't be trusted.'

'Found your problem - there was a hairball in the gasline.'

"Looks like we'll be eating leftovers for a month!"