Tv Sitcom Addict Gifts

Further Sanctions

Showbiz Awards

This is Lenny the leopard with the on-the-spot news.

"Would you sit and watch a 12 hour movie?"

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

'Why can't we trade him to that lady for her two little girls?'

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."

'They're just like us, except they watch more television.'

'Now for today's numbers...'Bad Dogs' outnumbered 'Good Dogs' by two-to-one...'

"I don't know if I can do 'Gilmore Girls' today. I'm not sure I'm feeling up for anything involving witty yet poignant repartee."

Stephen Fry

Big screen TV falling through floor

"We'd better stock up on TV snacks in the event of war."

'The anger management is working... tonight there were fewer veins popping.'

"This just in... the country has adopted a 24 hr military clock... ...details at 23."

"The end of my favorite series is near."

'It's a program on paranoia. Every time I leave the room, they stop and wait for me to come back.'

'Hello Mr Preston? This is an ALIEN speaking. We have landed in your paddock. We have mutilated your cows. We have made loud crashing noises...what the hell is on your TV that's so special?'

"Despite thoroughly scraping the celebrity barrel, that Orwellian nightmare Celebrity Big Brother is back on our screens again."

'No, you can't just watch the end of Bargainhunt!'

NOVA. Don't worry --- The "vacuum of space" is not that kind of vacuum.

"Please don't watch this show! There's a viewer trigger warning and a short fuse alert."

Astrological forecasts of the rich and famous

It's only a remote, dear...if you want better programs you will need a wand.

Lady throws dart to decide which soap opera she's going to watch.

Can't Touch This

'The inaugural address? It's sort of like an opening monologue.'

Starvation Watching

Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what is good on Netflix.

'During the next commercial, I'd like to talk to you about your childhood.'

'So, ten thousand pounds could be yours if you call in and answer this question...Why the hell aren't you in bed?!'

"When did you first notice you were larger than life?"

'Dear, you're not supposed to take it seriously...it's a reality show!'

"Can you do battle with him later?... He's watching, 'Game of Thrones'."

"Is anything good on?"