Tv Show Aficionado Gifts

'We talk, we dialog, we speak one to the other, but we don't communicate.'

'I can't find the words to express my anger with you.' - 'She needs a dictionary.'

Ant and Dec.

Pop goes the weasel.

It'll be nice to see your mother after all these years!

'Sure, it's fun to watch, but Sesame Street is just a trick to get you softened up for school!'

'Yes, Albert, storylines for television series - anything else?'

'Welcome to Hell's entertainment section. You've got the fanciest TV set here with hundreds of very interesting channels. Unfortunately, the remote control doesn't work...'

"I suppose Beavis and Butt-head are the Ren and Stimpy of our time."

I don't care what happened on ER. This doctor patient relationship is not going to descend into unbridled passion.

'They can't fire Barney. He has tenure.'

Inspector Norse

'There it goes again,,,everytime I get into a good gallop,,,that damn music,,,'

'Ahmadinejad strikes me as the kind of man Jay Leno makes jokes about...'

'You had me at 'warning'.'

Love is when you watch television together.

He says he respects you...He is willing to offer you monkey diarrhea!

A ostrich leans out of the tv to pick up bird food.

'Poor thing - she's muse to a TV soap writer.'

Lifestyles of the Rich and Subpoenaed

This Is Your Life - "He's been stalking you for the last ten years."

"Dr Whom?"

"Hi honey, I'm Homo Erectus!"

Dalek Pest Control

"They finally did it! They put 33 minutes of commercials into a 30-minute show."

"Turns out the squatch I thought I had filmed was actually Bobo from that show 'Finding Bigfoot'. . . He said he forgot to shave!"

Louis Theroux

"I'm not really an actor; I just play one on TV."

"Don't tell me . . . strictly has started again."

"Why do you watch so much TV? What's the attraction?"

'The purple dinosaur fan thinks it's really funny that I watched Captain Kangaroo when I was a kid.'

"Do your market research. Dig. Poll. We want this to be he freshest, most original group of reruns ever shown."

"The following program was made possible by a bunch of sociopaths, apparently."

Lifeguard.

'We know you are a serious actress..'