Traffic Warden Gifts

'The traffic wardens around here are absolute b**tards.'

'Slow, Slower, Total Moron.'

'Well thank God...I thought for one minute you were a kissogram.'

Clamped car in traffic

Nazi Traffic Warden.

'I'm sorry, Mum. But, if I let you off, I'll have to let everyone's mum off.'

Santa gets a ticket

'I don't make the rules, sir. I'm just grateful for those who do.'

No double parking.

"Sire. I fear that we shall have to turn back. He has a hi-vis vest and a road cone."

'I'm not writing him out a ticket...you do it!'

St. Peter's Car Park - Pray and Display.

Wheel clamped!

"You've got a fairy light at the back."

"Didn't see the sign. Isn't blindness considered a handicap?"

Traffic warden tied to a lamp post with double yellow lines.

Man with Stop Signs.

Inventor of the wheel sees man inventing wheel clamp.

"You've parked on a double-yellow line!"

'In future a reg number will suffice, ok.'

"Yes, as I matter I am handicapped and I'm playing golf this very afternoon!"

"Do you realise who I AM?"

"Mind if I out it on my credit card?"

20-second Parking Meter.

In one last act of civil disobedience, Carl pulled over and died.

The Automatic Policeman

No Parking - Financial Advisor On Call.

'Couldn't you forget your job just for one day!'

Warning...clamping. (scooter has been clamped).

Traffic warden in a wheelchair giving a ticket to a driver in a disabled space.

Traffic warden directing people in the gym.

'I think I need glasses, I've just given my own car a ticket.'

'I invented the parking ticket.'

Tank parks on the yellow lines.

'Ah, now this is awkward. Do you have a pen I could borrow?'