Traffic Officer Gifts

"He passed the sobriety test. Now I think he's just showing off."

'Says he's done his 4.5 hours driving and won't budge for another 15 minutes!'

'Can I call you back?'

Roadwork ahead: Proceed cautiously and from love rather than negativity.

Parking downtown is getting harder and harder.

Zebra Crossing

Traffic sign: Right lane ends - Merge into oncoming traffic.

'I just love the snow, everything is so peaceful!'

Linda mad a killing during slow-moving commuter traffic.

'Now I don't know what it's like in New York, but this is Kansas city, and we follow the laws of physics out here.'

'Hang on, don't cross now: I can see a car coming...'

"How can a hands-free phone be dangerous? I just don't see it!"

"New year's resolution - respect pedestrians!"

'Where'd you learn to drive!?'

It's alright darling, I'm driving hands free

'It was HIS fault, he was doing the SPEED LIMIT!'

'Would you mind blowing into this bag Sir?'

'Twenty-two circus clowns without seatbelts. Well, I just made my quota for the month!'

Digital Communication.

The End Is Near

The Sex life of a Driving Test Examiner, "Thank you. I will not ask you to perform that manoeuvre again."

Speeding Forklift

"It's perfectly safe ? I've switched to hands-free." (Driver steers with his feet while talking on mobile phone).

Speed Checked By Radar.

Accident adds insult to injury: 'Moron!'

"You got this."

Car driver in bus lane: 'But I am a bus driver officer, it's my day off.'

'I thought forty is the new thirty.'

'Put me down! You're driving!"

'You were doing the speed limit. I ofund that suspicious.'

'I don't suppose you're just writing me a Valentine?'

Speed bumps

'I've stopped you on suspicion of texting while behind the wheel of a moving vehicle. I'm going to require a thumb sample...'

"When I asked to see your licence I meant your driving licence, not your dog licence."

"Why don't you lot concentrate on catching some real criminals? - Like motorists?"