Tractor Maintenance Gifts

Farmer complaining about his repair bill.

12 O'clock was 'I'm a tractor time.'

'Dang it, I just washed this street. Boy, every time...'

"These colder temperatures always cause my tire pressure to drop—it's a good thing I stopped to check." Peter finally grows up.

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

Deflator mouse

Neighbor Leaf Wars

"Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why."

"I'd like a new tire for my 1976 Chevy Chevette."

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

"Lovely dovetail."

'You change him, and I'll change the tire.'

Home De-Po. Things you need for your project. Things you didn't know you needed until you were halfway through your project.

"One more rinse and the inside of your car will be clean too, Dad."

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

Farmers' Warnings.

Al's Farm Equipment: Our Prices Can't Be Beat!

Auto parts, Lite Puff Pastries, & Health Insurance Exchange.

'Wilbur took really, really good care of his car.'

Tractor Racing

'Well OF COURSE I rotate the tires! How do you think I got here?'

"You're developing a nice, rich compost down here."

"2 for 1 special: Clean, polish, buff, seal"

"It took a lot of work to build this car..."

'If I was this car I wouldn't let you in the drivers seat!'

Kid about scratched up car to dad: 'I made a mistake washing the car with a brillo pad.'

Lazy plumber.

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

"Good news...turns out it was just your battery!"

"We're having a little trouble with our hydraulic lift. I guess my question is, do you still want your muffler replaced?"

Car wash / Mouth wash

'Whatever happened to 'Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.''

"Washing your car will cause it to rain – science or superstition? We investigate on the next 'Cause and Effect.'"