Text Decipherer Gifts

"I believe it was called 'cursive'."

"I'm not sure she really liked our gift. She used just two exclamation points after 'Thanks'."

"Are you sure there wasn't a floor model?"

'At this juncture in my presentation, I'd like to dispense with the illusion of coherence.'

'Here you are, Simmons!'

By the year 2500, 1 in 10 academics will devote their entire career to divining the meaning of the word 'sussudio'.

"This is amazing! Roughly translated, it says 'King Tut was here o.k.'"

"And that was just your sudoku chart."

"No Jenkins, that's NOT a sales graph - it's my salary increase."

"Let me guess: Step two, add sand."

'Right there is where he departs from the script.'

'...we were able to hide some rather significant losses.'

"You'll be working entirely on commission. We were kidding about the salary."

Maze of legalities.

Auditioning for Finnegans Wake.

"I believe it translates to... have a nice day."

'I've never seen this symbol before. What could it mean?'

Never choose a vacation spot by its posters.

'These pamphlets will explain the procedure and these leaflets will explain the pamphlets.'

Marooned Optometrist

Descartes School of Philosophy.

Two tourists inspecting a French sign

"I would be bilingual if you were bilingual!"

'While we appreciate your hard work Eddie, I think we are going to have to go a different direction with this position.'

Pharmacist, prescriptions - "It's a forgery, I can read it."

"If we could decipher their language we'd have a clue to their intelligence levels."

Dept of statistics: 'vital...nonessential'.

'Connect insert A, B, and C into slots D, E, and F. Tighten using assembly tool G. What in the H are they talking about?'

Dog Typos.

'I got all woozy reading the restrictions in my health insurance contract!'

Cuba Economic Results 2015

'I love the message, but the art leaves me cold blooded!'

'Beetles...I heard if you listen to their songs backwards, there are cryptic messages.'