Ten Commandments Enthusiast Gifts

"They broke all the Commandments. Can they have some more?"

No, you idiots, they don't include a "comments" section.

Moses separating his Laundry.

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

'The Lord spake to Moses? You mean voice mail?'

'Yes, all at once!'

'No, smart guy -- it means all of them at once!'

Ezekiel and his Dog: "Have you been in the valley of dry bones again?"

'Look, I never said salvation would be PRETTY!'

'Wow! It didn't take long to lose that new ark smell.'

The loving, yet vengeful God of Cheshire!

'Sometimes I wish we'd never told him he was adopted.'

'We're going to start this week's sermon with a review of the basics....'

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

'These sure rule out a lot of options....'

''No other gods before me'? Oh - You're one of THOSE types.'

"Wait, mister Samson. The manager said he'll give you a full refund and a year's worth of free stylings."

'Thou shall not covet the neighbours same sex partner.'

Horseshoes...Samson-style

'Let your people go? - after all the trouble I went to getting them full employment?'

"I was kind of hoping just to tell them what they want to hear...."

'What about three-day Sabbaths?'

'Does it come on Disc?'

"Daniel, I seem to have dropped my keys, could you look around and toss them up."

"If he doesn't like the hand puppet routine, I'll try running the burning bush idea by him."

'We were hoping You'd just say 'Be fruitful and multiply' again.'

Noah Sent and Received the First Tweet

Jesus wept

Noah's Nark.

'I just glanced back at Sodom and Gomorrah for a second...'

'Actually, we were hoping for a less high-maintenance God.'

"No, it's not a to-do lost."

"A plague of frogs? Awesome!"

"He never lets you forget that he had a cameo in the Old Testament."

'Maybe you should see an attorney if it was over somebody's head you broke the tablets.'