Temporary Employment Coordinator Gifts

'I know the ad said 'temporary,' but when did you say you had your last contraction?'

The Department of Blind-Side Bias, Knowledge Gaps and Really Great Coffee.

"Would anyone like to question my downsizing proposal?"

"We offer a generous flex time policy - you can work your 90 hours per week any way you'd like."

'If he has a pulse, hire him!'

"Because of illness, the role of Mimi in tonight's performance will be sung by a temp."

"Oh, as long as he needs you, Santa's a great guy. But once things slow down and he wants a little vacation time with Mrs. C., it's 'goodbye North Pole, hello crappy temp job!'"

More people working in Voluntary sector than 2010.

STRIP *Community Care * Squeezing it all in before lunch

"We'll start with some 'ice breakers' and 'team building' games..."

Filling Cabinet - "Why are all the letters different?"

Charity Shop Income on Rise

Temp Employment Agency. Ah, I see that you have a short attention span.

"We try to treat volunteers like regular members of staff, impossible workloads and no resources."

A relevant sign for the shopkeeper's predicament.

'We've been trying to ease out Old Stoney as Payroll Coordinator.'

'I'm looking for something, like, 364 days a year.'

'Loosing your job managing the community centre was obviously a blow...but luckily we have come up with a volunteering opportunity for you...'

Unemployed man given role as the 'gluten fairy'.

"Seems like all of Nancy’s nonprofit work is going to her head."

Human resources department is a stock full of humans.

We have an all volunteer workforce, and we're still losing money!

"I only live for 24 hours, so I need a temp job that pays big bugs."

'We're looking for a 'temp' employee to serve time in Leavenworth.'

'Nobody turned up to the 'effective communications' seminar...they didn't get our memo.'

'We can offer Volunteers a range of experiences including exhaustion, emotional overload, lack of support and stark terror.'

Contractor Ants

"I've given you a glowing reference, Hempson. And here's the disclaimer to go with it."

'So then I thought, what's the idea job for a gentleman with my years of experience, wisdom and a desire to help others.'

'Relax, you are in doggy heaven. I'm just from a temp service.'

"Sorry, Thompson. No temps on the corporate huddle."

"I'll be right back. If you need anything, just holler."

"For cryin' out loud, are you signing up or not?"

"A serf? We don't call you 'serfs' anymore. Nowadas we call you flexibly employed staff members!"

"It's from our 'Time Management' trainer. He's double booked and can't come!"