Television Escapist Gifts

A people-meter family out enjoying the calm night breezes while claiming to be inside enjoying a rerun of 'Falcon Crest.'"

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

'Where would you recommend for a tech-free experience.'

"Mum! - T.S. Eliot - 'Humankind cannot bear much reality'."

"Water balloons... water balloons..."

Cyb-R Safe: Offering the most convincing illusion of on-line security available today!

"Relax, Marge! I'm sure the folks at 'Ultimate Pirate Adventures'. . ."

I'd like to order a power outage. Huh? My wife's on her phone all day, my son plays video games nonstop. My boss finds me by email wherever and whenever. My pager rings 'round the clock! Say again? I was text messaging. Pull the plug, man!

"It's a weak pilot, but, if your stick with it, by Season 3 you grow completely numb to the show's quality and just keep hitting Next Episode."

"Not again!"

"I'm skipping that movie and waiting for the theme park ride."

Man opens front door to find he's up in clouds.

"He went that-a-way." (snail escapes).

But doc, my tenuous grasp of reality is what gets me through the day!

"Anywhere that doesn't have TVs, computers, radios, ipods, cell phones, or video games."

'If you keep running away, son, you'll never make it through your formative years.'

Message in a bottle.

"Goddess of Good give me strength! I must. . . get. . . off. . . the. . . internet!"

"Log into nature"

Cartoon characters unable to instantly recover from catastrophic injuries support group.

Hiding From Social Media

American Idle

"Do you have any video games that would help reduce my role as a father?"

"I’ve recently started self-medicating with viral pet videos."

'Joyce, you've gotta see this! This 3-D large screen HD TV is amazing!'

'These blinders help block out banner ads.'

"Yo've got to be more specific, Ed. Wake you when what's over?"

'A lovely area, but not enough waiters!'

"I have no problem with reality. It's just the occasional intrusion of gritty realism that I hate."

Liking the Exit.

Virtual Reality Check

The anti-social network: 'In other words, you want to help the internet blow itself up.'

Sometimes you wanna go where nobody knows your name

www.islandcam.org Just when Doug thought things couldn't get any worse

"It's like I'm in space with a headache."