Televangelist Enthusiast Gifts

"She's addicted to televangelists."

'The BOSS sent me down to help rebuild your faith.'

"Trust me Jesus, if you want to make a bigger impact work on being seeker friendly."

"I'm just glad we got out before interest rates went up again."

'Of course homosexuality is not a sin, handsome.'

"Unbelievable! A tick!"

"I never dreamed we'd migrate."

"What? You broke number 3 already?"

"They're SUPPOSED to have a disparate impact!"

"Seriously, just pull my finger ..."

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

'My husband? -- He went to the theologically-challenged place.'

"What did Jesus order?"

'You know, I never have had a sabbatical....'

"I see you're an ex televangelist who would like to stay in sales."

"Excuse me, Reverend, but what, exactly, do you have to do to get a drink around here?"

The ecumenical dinner party.

10 Commitments? Sure, I guess I could give him those, too.

'Of course the Johnsons got the big cloud.'

'Why did Moses wander in the desert for forty years?'

Angel to lady: 'I'm the angel food cake angel. I bring you peace, hope and comfort food.'

'I'll let your people go when they're fully pyramid-compliant!'

"It would be great if you could turn the smoke machine down a little during worship..."

'One really nice thing up here is that it's always very easy to get an audience with a Pope.'

"There Adam. Isn't that a lot more comfortable than that silly little fig leaf?"

"No, the Trinity is not the Father, The Son, and the Preacher's wife."

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

To monk showing book entitled 'Brand Spanking New Testament': "I think we may have to shorten the title."

THE ST. FRANCIS OF ASSISI SHOW.

"And the Lord said, 'You know, it takes a ton of money to run a place like this.'"

Guitars in Heaven

"Oh goody! It's just like the Columbian Exposition of 1893."

Heavenly Gazette This Heavenly Gazette is awfully thin. There doesn't seem to be a financial section Because you can't take it with you. There's no weather forecast. It's perfect every day. I don't see any sports scores. Everybody's a winner up here. And there are no political reports. Of course not in paradise we don't hear anything about politics!

Mexican angels.

"Bip."