Tv Evangelist Gifts

'We've been recieving Earth's TV evangelists for years.'

"Before I share the meaning of life with Dave, let's take some calls from our viewers around the world."

"Trust me Jesus, if you want to make a bigger impact work on being seeker friendly."

"I see you're an ex televangelist who would like to stay in sales."

"Ladies, gentlemen, come in and take a seat. I've decided to take this corporation in an entirely new direction."

THE ST. FRANCIS OF ASSISI SHOW.

Guitars in Heaven

The Ordered List

Computerized society.

"And the Lord said, 'You know, it takes a ton of money to run a place like this.'"

'Now that's what I call a religious broadcast.'

The evangelist turned lawyer's opening arguments were unconvincing

"Well, can we leave some of our literature with you?"

"Repent! The Venga bus is coming!"

"Hear me, for the Lord has given me an exclusive."

"It was a gift from god."

Captive Audience.

A preacher of open-source software.

"Have you ever thought about becoming a duck?"

'And exactly how much less did it cost to implement Five Sigma instead of Six, Dwayne?'

'It gives me more energy than five grande espressos.'

"J is the reason for the season."

'Don't play with firework(ers).'

"Could we talk Girl Scout cookies?"

Motorcycle Faith Healer

"We're raising money for our church so our preacher can get a new luxury jet...!"

"I expected the mission field to be a little more modern."

"For trick or treating, I'm dressing up as Billy Graham and going witnessing door-to-door."

'Cult? What makes you think it's a cult?'

"REPENT! REPENT! REPENT!"

'I feel awkward asking you whether you'd consider me for a missionary position.'

'For Heavens' sake, Murray! Corporate identity isn't bad, but do you really have to do this on every commercial spot from your company?'

Religious marketing, televangelist jumping out of hte TV

Jerry Falwell - Evangelist.

"Rapunzel, Rapunzel, I'm here to share a brief Bible message with you about the good news of God's Kingdom."