Tail Tale Fan Gifts

'That's it, you've got it! I told you I could teach you how to hang by your tail!'

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

"It get it – you're hungry."

Fishing Tales

Ducks and hares taken in by a wolf at a seance

Alice in Wonderland: The Queen Turns into a Pack of Cards.

"I think someone's trying to play games with us."

Thomas Hardy

The Tale of the Tape of the Tail.

'You've got restless wag syndrome.'

Fishing Boat Derby

"That's right kiddo, I'm one of the original band members of the Musicians of Bremen..."

Paul Bunyan gets the leg-lengthening Operation

Lady walking a dog with a big tail.

Good boy

"...and the dung was this big!.... No...elephant, actually."

"You should've seen the triceratops that got away. It had to be this...um...this...uh...well, it was huge."

Men reading Tall Stories, and Short Stories in a Library

"Yes, I was using my mobile whilst driving... I was calling the police to tell them I was chasing a gang of bank robbers!"

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

'All this is nuthin! There was one yeaw up noth...when it snowed fah two yeaws! I had t'dig down ten feet t'haul in my lobstah traps.'

"At long last, Wyatt, our dream has come true and we are within reach of the legendary toast fields of the Sierra Madre."

"Once inside, the pawns will jump out and take them by surprise."

A Salmon Lie

'He's making tremendous progress. last week he had three tails.'

"Pecos Bildungsroman"

'Take Gerald a cup of punch or something, I think he's feeling left out.'

Captain Eddie's New Boat:'The insurance company laughed last year when I insisted on adding Kraken coverage.'

'Sure you always catch bigger fish than me. Your arms are a foot longer than mine.'

"Have you tried unplugging and plugging it back in?"

'He doesn't exaggerate, he just remembers big.'

"As I see it, the issue with dog-walking services is that the pace is dictated by whoever is slowest..."

'That's right kids: I jumped through rings of fire when I was with the Circus!'

Circus trousers

"So I break free and I swear that hook was this big."