Style Jester Gifts

"Keep it long at the back and big and bushy on top please."

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

'Your French dip, sir.'

"We're following Carrot Top."

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

Stepping on clown's shoe...

All-Candy Seder.

Books / Coffee table books

'Make him laugh, make him cry.'

'Guess what I'd like to see disappear next.'

You make me feel more like a veterinarian than a psychiatrist, Al. Why is that, Dr. Kapuchnik? Because you're one sick puppy.

"I'm popping out for a tinkle."

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

'Make sport of the Queen.'

"Gracie, don't worry so much about your big test... You know, when I was your age, I didn't know the meaning of the word 'fear'. Until I looked it up."

'I'm looking for someone who can make me laugh.'

Travelling jesters. No fools left aboard overnight.

'Ringing in your ears, you say?'

'I told the jester he could take April Fool's Day off.'

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

"I forgot how to tie mine, too."

'I hate these commerical breaks!'

"Yuck! Som'one left their nose in this book!"

To sleep, perchance to wake up as a different person.

'From left to right: witchfinder general, jester jocular and spouse peculiar.'

Never poke fun.

"Before I start today's sermon let's take 5 minutes to view the highlights reel from the last 3 Sundays..."

Poet's Corner

'Is he taking the piss?'

Easter Island heads bunny ears.

'Do something else - I don't like irony.'

'Hoopla!'

Watch the author miss his deadline 4 to 7

"Would you be upset if we marked it as humor?"

Homeless man's sign: 'Sperm donor to the crowned heads of Europe.'