Student Humor Lover Gifts

"I'd like a rebate because I don't intent to be attending any lectures..."

'Hmph. College kids.'

'I made a good grade in creative writing, but I didn't do very well in creative spelling.'

'In Show and Tell today, I showed my birthmark! I got expelled!'

"I'm sorry. I don't have yours. My dog ate your homework."

"Political Science... that's in the Department of Performing Arts."

'You're flunking me? -- What about the statute of limitations?'

'I'm going to have to give up drinking and drugs when I leave uni - to pay off my bank loan.'

"I think the teacher who says that I got into trouble today is part of the fake news conspiracy."

"The principal has sat in on so many of my classes, I'm thinking of giving him the exam."

'I don't think much to faith school dinners.'

"No, I'm not the first in my family to attend college. But I am the first at an Ivy."

"I'm taking 'moving back in with the parents' studies."

"Hi, Mom - We learned in school today that ethics and morality are stupid and old-fashioned."

'The dog won't eat my homework.'

"Yes, next year you'll be moving from classroom to classrooms, and, no, it doesn't count as PE."

'Sorry, Jimmy... our school has a strict 'don't show, don't tell' policy!'

"I'm subcontracting math, spelling and geography to my smart phone."

Dear folks. Well, you were right; being the prettiest gator of the Everglades hasn't helped me one bit.'

"What did you study in school today, Gracie?"

'I was a substitute teacher. Former students still approach me to thank me for everything I let them get away with.'

"You were sent to the principal again for horsing around? That's so unfair!"

Room-mate Homicides Waiting to Happen. . .

'My principal wants to see you about my principles.'

'It has cut down on note-passing, glancing at fellow students' test papers and spitballs.'

'Is it okay if I'm represented by counsel on open-school night?'

"Sorry... My School Aversion Syndrome is totally bad today."

'You're lucky! Your teacher never gives you any homework.'

"I'd like to propose a bill to the effect that we can remain freshmen indefinitely."

'Sorry I'm late -- the Principal held me for questioning.'

'I know it hasn't any wheels...They're still in the pencil.

High school sophomore Kyle Rimnard tests his theory that cafeteria meatloaf cures acne.

'When I was your age, an 'A' did not stand for 'adequate'.'

"Next, I will make the excitement and enthusiasm of the start of the school year disappear."

'How do you like school?'