Store Closure Gifts

Tannery.

Bookshop: Closed, Coming Soon Here Internet Cafe.

Writing an obituary for a small independent grocery.

'Neither a lender nor a borrower be.'

Golden parachutes inc. - 'Our pleas for bail-out funds were ignored.'

Kentucky Fried Horse

"We're still the same, great company we've always been, only we've ceased to exist."

'We're e-bankrupt.'

Sales

Line on graph goes right through floor.

Small Businesses Go Under.

"Mr. Joyner, while you were out, your carefully constructed financial empire collapsed like a house of cards."

"Can I dress business casual even though I lost our business?"

Mom & Pop General Store - Going Out of Business Slowly But Surely

"According to the most recent report, we have no recourse but to abandon ship."

Theater Owner Who Refused To Convert To Digital Projection.

'Business is very good. We'll soon be moving to smaller premises.'

Grand Opening and Closing Down Sale simultaneously occurring.

"I see you've got a new cheese counter."

'I've put the business up for sale.'

Rats Flea a Sinking Ship

"I lost everything-the business, the house, the landscape."

'Your call would have been important to us before we went out of business.'

'Does that mean things are getting better or worse?'

Factory closed. The 1st CEO got most of it, as a bonus, when we fired him. Ditto, the 2nd CEO, and the last CEO got what was left.

In case of insolvency break glass.

Bitch-Slapped-By-The-Invisible-Hand-Of-The-Marketplace Sale

Sale! Going Out of Monkey Business

'I remember when this was all shops!...'

'Tell the staff the company has hit a symbolic iceberg and is slowly sinking.'

'We had become too materialistic anyway.'

'At least they offered us a severance gift card.'

"I suppose a lot of people do their worshipping online these days."

"It's a 'Thank you' email, my small business is going under but chuck, Nancy. . ."

Lemonade stall gone bankrupt.