Stock Superfan Gifts

'Then one day Ralph decided there isn't anything more important than money, and became a day trader.'

Atomic Bear: Part 21

Film Festival. Events. Screenings. Ernie attends these festivals in costume. He's gone over to the dork side!

You invested in Facebook?! How could you? That bugs you? You, of all people, are mad that the FTC is suing Meta Platforms in an antitrust case? No, I mean how can you afford to invest? If you can afford to buy stock, then I pay you way too much. It was only $40! Quiet, I'm calculating your pay cut.

Pay me not to pay 'Wonderwall'

'hold the blog - I got a bargain in the sales'

Love.

It's nothing to worry about - many kids his age have trouble with the letter S.

"Dear, there's someone here to collect your soul."

Star Wars convention...

"Chills, Randy. I feel chills. And I can't move." "And I can't remember the last time my palms were this sweaty." "This must've been what people felt like when they heard the Allies were finally invading Normandy on D-Day." "No way any movie can live up to this hype." "Wolverine day is almost upon us." "We are about to embark upon the great crusade..."

'Two new NBA franchises: The 'Wall Street Bulls' and the 'Main street bears'.'

'As expected, your shares of de ja vu are rebounding, again.'

'He hibernates between superbowls.'

Back in the football stadium - without face masks and social distancing!

"I'm so sorry, there is nothing I can do for him anymore...he must have been offline for at least 10 hours..."

"I'm sure you want little Jimmy to have a complete set of 'Muscular Heroes of the Cosmos,' now, don't you, Mr. Bennett?"

"Just picking up some Super Bowl provisions."

Yeah, right, like Superman was the only flavor they had. Ice cream.

A man imagines flying as a superhero.

Banana Ballet

"O.K., let's see what all the fuss is about."

Die-hard soccer moms.

Soccer Fans.

'I know my electric bills are way over due, but could you at least wait until the Super Bowl is over before turning off my electricity?'

'Lenny NEVER had any problems with cramped seats at football games - like most people do.'

Welcome to 'Should've, Would've, Could've', the investment hindsight show.

'Sit down, Dave. You're not impressing anyone with your new laser-eye treatment.'

What can I get you? An explanation about why Disney can't do what we all want the to do … and have the folks who made Rogue One go back and remake the super-lame Star Wars prequel trilogy. Would you like the inaccurate explanation or the accurate one? Inaccurate would be lovely, please. It's too soon to remake "Phantom Menace." Plus it'd be confusing. Besides, the prequels were good enough. What're you talking about? It's been 18 years since "Phantom Menace." And movies get rebooted all the time

Noah's Art Sports Network. Are we all set for the Super Bowl broadcast? I think so. The turtle will handle the pregame show which seems to drag on forever. A zebra will be brought on to analyze close calls referees have to make. The sloth is in charge of slow motion shots. And color will be provided by the chameleon. Thankfully, there's a retractable roof over at the stadium. That's good. The forecast says there's a possibility of a little rain.

"Hmm, that's interesting, but can you ask the voices in your head to zip it till I hear the score?"

'Off to pay your last respects,darling?'

"Sure he's still Mr. Right, Beth? Up there in that Bluejays cap?"

Stock Exchange. The stock price is being artificially pumped up! They're using share-oids!

Nate was Martha Stewart's biggest fan. 'Hi, I'm Nate. I love all your work.I can't tell you how excited I am to finally meet you!'