Stir Sticks Gifts

Drink for me and my hot mamma. Now! We don't serve beer. Latte. Two, punk! Decaf. You don't want to see him angry. Also, low-foam and soy milk would be great. You don't want to see him gassy. Can I get one of those little Twizzler sticks to stir it with? Cube of brown sugar, please. And one nonfat blueberry scone! Two! I'd like to see how John Wayne would've ordered a fancy coffee drink.

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

'He's a superior breed - He always drinks thru' a straw!'

Boy and his dog

'What's amazing is that I only threw one stick.'

'Sometimes I wish we'd never told him he was adopted.'

"It's exhausting trying to keep him from throwing away perfectly good sticks."

"Let's try 'roll over.' We can come back to this."

"Honestly, I prefer stick."

...If sauce has not begun to thicken after 10 minutes, pour contents back into can and wait for your wife to get home.

Fuzz - Nigel can twiddle his drumsticks.

"I'm beginning to believe that this is just busy work."

The best part of leaf piles... are the sticks.

'Assuming moral absolutes - good dog.'

'I find it more effective to walk softly and carry a BIGGER stick.'

'Good boy. That's better than the others, but still too long. For playing fetch, I prefer a shorter stick, shaped like that, without bark or moss, and not quite as heavy.'

'Community wok?'

How many ways can a coach say 'get the ball and score some points'.

''Fetch'? - What are you, my personal trainer?'

'Why does this crazy human keep throwing away my stick?'

'What d'you say to a massive Szechuan-style wok fry-up before we start?'

'You're supposed to fetch the stick back,not throw it.'

'He's my personal trainer.'

Dog Getting Reading to Catch A Stick.

'Are you trying to tell me that you don't want to go to school?'

"How long will it take to widen this door?"

"If he wants that stick, why did he throw it all the way over there?"

Stirrbucks

'Have you met my personal trainer?'

Let's mull it over!

"This time, by god, he's going to hang on to the d*mn stick."

'Don't chase it - You don't know where it's been.'

"Look, here's one that comes with batteries."

"One day dogs will rule the world but, in the meantime, just keep chasing sticks."

"The stick maker!"