Stick Finder Gifts

The best part of leaf piles... are the sticks.

Drink for me and my hot mamma. Now! We don't serve beer. Latte. Two, punk! Decaf. You don't want to see him angry. Also, low-foam and soy milk would be great. You don't want to see him gassy. Can I get one of those little Twizzler sticks to stir it with? Cube of brown sugar, please. And one nonfat blueberry scone! Two! I'd like to see how John Wayne would've ordered a fancy coffee drink.

'Why Sally, you look so fetching with that stick!'

"....And what's the deal with fetch? You want the stick or don't you? Make up your mind already!"

'What's amazing is that I only threw one stick.'

Boy and his dog

'Sometimes I wish we'd never told him he was adopted.'

"The universe must love dogs - otherwise, why would sticks just fall from the sky?"

Canine conundrum.

"It's exhausting trying to keep him from throwing away perfectly good sticks."

"Honestly, I prefer stick."

'I'm sorry Rex, but since getting this new stick for Christmas, I have no further need for you.'

'My first day in our vineyard wasn't a total loss, honey. I found two pennies.'

'I'm sorry I ever told them it's a game of inches.'

"Yes, they've hired a professional dog-walker! Frankly, I would have preferred a dog-runner or at least a ball or stick thrower..."

"I'm beginning to believe that this is just busy work."

"The applications are limitless."

'Made your point.'

'I just want to find out where my apprentice left my favorite drill.'

'Assuming moral absolutes - good dog.'

''Fetch'? - What are you, my personal trainer?'

'Good boy. That's better than the others, but still too long. For playing fetch, I prefer a shorter stick, shaped like that, without bark or moss, and not quite as heavy.'

"Well I thought it was obvious I would be charging a finders fee"

The Carrot and Stick.

I have no problem chasing a stick. I mean, as long as it's for a good cause.

"The boring bit about cricket is waiting for them to find the ball after you've hit a six."

'He's always trying to get rid of that stick. I bring it back just to torture him.'

'You're supposed to fetch the stick back,not throw it.'

'My, my, don't we look fetching.'

He keeps throwing it away and I keep trying to recycle it.

'Let's switch sides. My feet are killing me.'

'He's my personal trainer.'

"Some manage with a carrot, and others, with a stick. I find success with both."

Main St Ottowa

"At least he's being buried with the one he loved most."