Stick Selector Gifts

'Good boy. That's better than the others, but still too long. For playing fetch, I prefer a shorter stick, shaped like that, without bark or moss, and not quite as heavy.'

'Why Sally, you look so fetching with that stick!'

"....And what's the deal with fetch? You want the stick or don't you? Make up your mind already!"

"The universe must love dogs - otherwise, why would sticks just fall from the sky?"

"It's exhausting trying to keep him from throwing away perfectly good sticks."

"Honestly, I prefer stick."

'The hardest part of being a street crazy is picking each day's sign.'

"Why, Ed Dunlop! Didn't you used to be my chief stock picker?"

'I'm sorry Rex, but since getting this new stick for Christmas, I have no further need for you.'

"Yes, they've hired a professional dog-walker! Frankly, I would have preferred a dog-runner or at least a ball or stick thrower..."

'You can't vote him off, dear - he's the newsreader'

"The applications are limitless."

"I ordered my steak rare - and this is well done...!"

'Made your point.'

The best part of leaf piles... are the sticks.

"In case anyone walks by and sees the bottle you ordered, we offer a sticker saying your first bottle was rated 98."

'Assuming moral absolutes - good dog.'

No, he wants the other one … No, not that one … No, to your right … No, above that one …

"Well I thought it was obvious I would be charging a finders fee"

'Can I choose which brick you name after me?'

The Carrot and Stick.

'Doctor, I don't think the five-second rule applies to transplant organs.'

I have no problem chasing a stick. I mean, as long as it's for a good cause.

'and for my 12,307 choice I'd have the live extended version of...'

'He's always trying to get rid of that stick. I bring it back just to torture him.'

I love hockey!

'Let's switch sides. My feet are killing me.'

'My, my, don't we look fetching.'

He keeps throwing it away and I keep trying to recycle it.

The lame stuff you listen to (yes, you)

Skate! Skate! Skate!

Main St Ottowa

"Some manage with a carrot, and others, with a stick. I find success with both."

'Okay Bob, but this is the last time. . . Honestly, if that stick is so important to you, you're going to have to learn to take better care of it.'

Rusty was a very smart dog.