Statistical Sampling Humorist Gifts

Dad learns about the difficulties of Statistical Sampling.

"You're going to hate yourself."

'Kix? Yes, Ma'am -- you can get your Kix on aisle 66.'

'Maybe we need new profit charts?'

"Wait! Stop! He changed his mind."

Annual Pollsters Convention. Wow, who could've predicted such a low turnout?

Bell Curve. Bell Curve after a few beers.

Satis Factory Tour

Elephant and Castle

Cuts, Measurements, Certain, Sloppy

'This red line indicates the change in this red line over a period of time,'

Bar chart

'...with a 38% chance that death do us part.'

"Caution! Now entering the margin of error."

Julius and Isabella Dufferburger, statistically average family with their 2.5 children.

"Hey, Venn - back off! I'm a pie chart."

"Is the snapper fresh?"

'Ha! OK Eddie. You owe me 50 bucks!'

Urp! Homo Eructus.

Economic Errata

'Finally some good news on the economy: four out of five economists agree that 80% if economists agree.'

"Forensics put time of death about 3 hours ago chief. . .they're certain it was a potato gun."

Pie company: 'Each slice of the pie represents slices of pie.'

Room for Error

"The bar charts show out clients overwhelmingly prefer pie charts."

'I can't let him back in to play. He couldn't tell me what he's making this year.'

'Would you knock it off with the 'woulda-coulda-shoulda'!'

The Gallop

'Growing old gracefully ... But frantically trying to keep in step with the cost of living!'

Scatter Graph

"You're history, Leonard."

'Seventy three percent of statistics are made up on the spot.'

"Waiter! I need a doggie bag and a body bag, please."

'DANDRUFF?! Those are just flakes!'

"36% of our focus group suffered from the side effects, while 14% enjoyed them."