Stadium Satirist Gifts

'..The wolves have got the sheep pinned against their own 1-yard line again!'

Superdome: Now Playing Har Bowl.

'We still can't afford to modernize the visitors dugout.'

'Tony, you always try to lead.'

"What's he going to do now, break wind?"

10K Run: Smoker's Lane.

'Yes! The momentum's going to shift now. Our home fan is starting to make some noise!'

A man is trying to play golf with a football boot attached to a stick.

The Golfing Accident

'Let's throw ball. Running game not working.'

'There! See that? Brad just happens to morph into some kind of hideous amphibian just as he's about to putt? Now tell me she's not cheating!'

United Football Club: In, Out, VAR.

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

The Hockey World

Major Bunker (who has been persuaded to join in a game of hockey for the first time, absent-mindedly preparing to drive). 'Force.'

Beijing Olympics - Treadmill.

"You may inflict pain, but it mustn't be severe or prolonged."

The Leafs win the Cup!

Volcano Sacrifice Competition

Goodbye Opiate of the Masses

'I use my Blackberry all the time to check the competition's executive bonuses.'

Various men worshipping a statue of a football

'Anyone else want to get up and leave before the game is over?'

Runner 007 is given a martini for refreshment.

'Secondhand smoke.'

Footballer holding team mates bum while preparing for a penalty shoot out

"After the big race, the tortoise and the hare are ordered to provide urine samples."

"I think Simon’s been hit on the head one too many times."

The solitude of bean farming appealed to the ex-ballplayer after his fall from grace.

Racketeer

'Yes, it's a foul. But is it a flagrant foul?'

Advertising space on jockeys' bottoms

Loser's Podium.

'And you say your face after you looked at the bill I sent you for your last visit.'