Sports Gatherings Gifts

"Who's winning the football game?...Sportsmanship or violence?"

If you bathe a skunk in tomato juice, it will smell like a dog. A bird in the hand is better than two in your shorts. Never wear aqua after Thanksgiving. Unconventional wisdom.

Tennis fans queuing at Wimbledon.

Go team!

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

Christmas Tree

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

#Thanksgiving #Nofilter

"I'm afraid the challah got a little burnt this week."

Wedding Day Itinerary.

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

The devil you know and his plus one

Illustration from an Unpublished Novel

The prying mantis,

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

"Damn those dugout Martinis!"

Barbecued dessert, anyone? The coals are PERFECT now!

"I think I'm having pre-traumatic stress disorder."

"I ask that today is a good day...a day that brings family together...to show how we need one another."

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

celebrating a birth.

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

"Truth is relative at these reunions. It depends on which relative you talk to."

"Here's the baby's first birthday, her second, her third, look at her gifts..."

"Great job of acting! You really appeared excited about Aunt May's 'famous' green bean casserole."

Miniature Cattle Fanciers

Newton had actually discovered gravity at a family dinner in his early childhood.

'We haven't had a family get-together like this since we were kids - Hey! Where are mum and dad?'

"At least this year she got rid of the seat belts."

'I told him if he didn't get here quick he'd miss out on all the beer and food.'

Any idea how long your family might be visiting?

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."

"You keep an eye on our horse. I'm checking to see if the bookie runs off with our money."

Children's Party

Paul goes home for the holidays