Soccer Jokester Gifts

Sepp fashions the new FIFA strip....

Funky Facts: Football.

"Before we begin. . . terms and conditions. . ."

Footballer holding team mates bum while preparing for a penalty shoot out

"You are aware that’s a golf ball?"

'When you said, Dream Team, I thought you meant the Swiss Bikini Team.'

'Robert.....Why do you think they call slanted letters italics.'

'And remember...no sudden moves in the shoot out.'

'Focus! Focus! You've just gotta' forget about their home ground advantage.

'It's great that you want a career in football, Timothy, but don't you think being a striker would be more fun than being a goalpost.'

'You're allowed to pick up the ball before it stops rolling, you know.'

Football Bomb

Footballer changes shirt with the ref.

"Seriously, fellas, I can't get up."

"Hey! I know that handwriting, St Valentines day last year!!!"

Ref shows footballer green card.

'You see, I would make a great goalkeeper...'

'Alan, it's the 11th hole, and that Tiger Woods mask isn't intimidating us...'

'As an exercise I placed eleven dustbins on the pitch and made the team dribble around them...The bins won 5-0.'

'Now that's what I call a tackle, Brian'

The defence were confident about their offside trap.

After review, the replay confirms a touchdown, and also that big, jiggly bellies look hilarious in slow motion.

Queen Elizabeth 2. Yankees ). I told you they wouldn't think it was funny.

FIFA scandal

VAR - a nail in the football coffin...

Jurassic Par.

'Vodka!'

'Remember, it's YOUR benefit game - go out and foul whoever you like!'

"Hands are much more capable of efficiently directing a ball into a net!"

'Trick play! Trick play!'

'Oh, come on. We just need one more body. Please die.'

'You're right, there's nothing in the rules against it.'

Baseball says to prankster basketball: You're such a joker.

What's that annoying buzzing noise? (Vuvuzelas)

'He's got tennis viewer's elbow'