Snobby Pet Owner Gifts

"I think what he's trying to tell you, dear, is that he doesn't quite care for the cheaper dog food!"

Seagiraffes

'Fetch.'

Biofelineism

"Will you be taking these home or chewing them right here?"

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

'I foresee a few more months of creating havoc without consequences, and then, yes, I see the 'cute' factor will start to wear thin...'

Cat Show

Pet psychic -- yup, she's for real.

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

Christmas Presents.

'You're doing that just to bug me, aren't you?'

'Settle an argument. Which is better incessant barking or meowing?'

"Oooooh....a western wear dog cone. Sexy!"

"He ate homework as a puppy but quickly moved onto business journals."

"We have to stop meeting like this – people are starting to talk ‘psychiatric ward.’"

he used to belong to a cartoonist

Lady taking her Cochin chickens for a walk.

"Now I'm sure that, at this point, you're wondering HOW I can remove the anal sacs..."

Hell No Kitty

"You will meet a tall, mysterious stranger — you will rub fur on his pant leg."

'And this is scraps.'

"That was the pet store, dear - they want to know if you've noticed any minor flashes of aggression in Joey since starting the steroid bird feed?"

'I'm trying to toilet train them.'

'If you don't notice an improvement after a few weeks, we can try a different cone.'

'He's an octopussy. They're specially bred to catch over 100 mice an hour.'

'Walking your pet amoeba again, Henry?'

'Last year's 'Bring your pet to work day' turned out very well.'

'Hey Joe!...Me? Oh,nothing much,just out walking the fish.And you?...'

'Could we go in ahead of you? His tranquilizer is wearing off.'

'I'm sure he thinks he's a parrot!'

'Russell, it's not necessary to take the goldfish out for a walk.'

"Well, if I didn't send away for an entry application to the cat show, and you didn't send away for an entry application, who did?"

'When you said you were a bee keeper...'