Funny Pet Owner Gifts

'Hurry up. We don't have all day!'

'Yes I can talk, can you fly?'

'My master is doing Nordic Walking and he needs to see the ophthalmologist!'

Dog Hunting Trophies.

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

'Table scraps, doggie-bag goodies, dropped hot dogs, the cat's dish of food and your master's slippers.'

'Super Dog'

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

Fish that snore, and the tragic lives of those who care.

Cat rolls up yarn like power cord.

Dog Dressed to Eat

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

"If he tries to dip, Mrs. Callister, you mustn't hesitate to use the choke chain."

"We're slapping you with a stress suit, pal!"

I know, it's so hard not to laugh every time that kid crawls by wearing just a poop bag.

Cat at Surprise Party.

'You get an A for effort, but an F in spelling.'

'Sometimes I feel sorry for those little baitfish, don't you, Ben?'

K9 Literati.

'I thought this was a documentary about animal cruelty.'

Pet Pony

"C'mon already...that lipstick really isn't my shade."

"What> Fitness isn't a destination, it's a way of life."

'Could we go in ahead of you? His tranquilizer is wearing off.'

"You say you're flossing, but I'm scraping off a lot of tennis ball fuzz."

"It's just until he gets over his laryngitis."

'Good book?'

'Satchel, life is like a can of tuna...'

"Bad Dog!!! You can't trust those chocolate labs."

'I do some light mousework for them in return for room and board.'

Dalmation with soccer ball: Soccer Hound.

"Well, if it wasn't you who meowed, and it certainly wasn't me who meowed...then...who...meowed?"

"Generally, when we go around the table sharing what we're grateful for, we just *say* it, Jerry."

"Why would I care of you scratch the couch? I'm not allowed on it..."

When Pugs dream.