Smoking Commentary Gifts

Health Food market. It's OK. It's tofu.

'They help with my nicotine patch addiction.'

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

'our chances seemed pretty good until you lighted that 20.'

Welcome to Hell - No Smoking

"I'm afraid the umbrella constitutes an enclosed space and must be taken down."

"More ashtray, nurse! For God's sake, more ashtray!"

"Love it! 'People of smoke' instead of 'Smokers.' "

"I only allow myself one after a meal - I'm now down to 43 meals a day!"

'Let's play some cards, boys. Oh, and by the way, the wife said if we figure out how to light these cigars we can smoke in the bowl.'

'Why can't you just chew bones like other dogs?' (dog smoking pipe).

Give up Smoking!

"That's why you don't smoke near the dang cannon!"

'Well actually, the only reason I put my head out of the window is that Master smokes while driving...'

"He said if we don't let him in, he'll huff and he'll puff and he'll fill up our whole house with cigar smoke."

'I used to be a pack animal. Lately, I've become a two pack animal.'

"We were thinking, J.W., just off the top of our heads, of course—why not make the stuff addictive?"

"Smoking causes cancer in humans. I'm canine."

No Goldfishing. A-hem!

"Have a cigar. Go ahead - they're bubblegum."

"We think he picked it up at the kennel."

Fish "Hey Kid, got a light?"

Tim's hopes for his safer smoking device were to be dashed when it failed to fit through the door...

Cigarettes $7.50 - Ask About Our Easy Payment Plan.

'Hi John, it's your partner, Peter. I've decided to have a non-smokers day off - it should just make up for all the cigarette breaks you've taken in the last month!'

'Smoking or non-smoking?'

Prehistoric Cigarette Lighter

If they ban smoking in cars...

"See? Right there - it says bubblegum."

Casino - featuring pre-owned cigarette smoke.

"I'm afraid we don't allow smoking in here sir. We consider it unhygenic."

"Sorry, sir, our smoking section is out in the parking lot. We'll be happy to serve you out there."

'It's a filthy and nasty habit, but at least, you won't end up with yellow teeth...'

Snowman