Smoking Ban Humorist Gifts

'Aren't we entitled to a ten minute smoking break?'

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

'our chances seemed pretty good until you lighted that 20.'

"I'm afraid the umbrella constitutes an enclosed space and must be taken down."

'Why can't you just chew bones like other dogs?' (dog smoking pipe).

"I only allow myself one after a meal - I'm now down to 43 meals a day!"

'Well actually, the only reason I put my head out of the window is that Master smokes while driving...'

'Forget about going to the store for a bicycle patch. I used one of your nicotine patches.'

"That's why you don't smoke near the dang cannon!"

"The bad news is my doctor limited me to one glass of wine per day. The good news is I get to pick the glass."

'Well the dog's been passively smoking our fags for the past ten years, so I think it's only fair that he has a nicotene patch too.'

Tim's hopes for his safer smoking device were to be dashed when it failed to fit through the door...

No Goldfishing. A-hem!

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Prehistoric Cigarette Lighter

'Smoking or non-smoking?'

"Smoking causes cancer in humans. I'm canine."

Grumpy man telling a teddy bear whoes watching TV to get out of his chair

'I used to be a pack animal. Lately, I've become a two pack animal.'

Punch has a smoking break.

'It's a nicotine patch: I'm trying to quit smoking...'

'It's a filthy and nasty habit, but at least, you won't end up with yellow teeth...'

"Sorry, sir, our smoking section is out in the parking lot. We'll be happy to serve you out there."

'The ones who smoke, masturbate... the ones who don't smoke, masturbate... is this a study on smoking or masturbation?'

"You should have mentioned in your resume that you could only do it once."

"See? Right there - it says bubblegum."

Smoking and non-smoking sides of a Volcano.

If they ban smoking in cars...

Casino - featuring pre-owned cigarette smoke.

'I roll my own E-cigarettes."

'The New World will be easy to conquer, Your Majesty -- they're all hooked on tobacco.'

Animals smoking at the zoo back entrance

"If smoking is so bad for you, how come it cures salmon?"

J. Smith: Passive Smoker

'We prefer that you not smoke that in here...'