Shopping Humor Enthusiast Gifts

"How much is the sign?"

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

"Shopping! Now that's what I call quality time!"

'How much would you take off for cash?'

Don't tell my wife. Dragon head.

Pirates at the mall.

"Well, we can try. But to be honest, I doubt that you'll get custody of your husband's credit cards."

What if retail stores behaved like websites?

"What would you suggest to fill the dark, empty spaces in my soul?"

"Sorry, Martin, but because you're the weakest link in our food chain here, you're fired."

"Once you break through the plastic clamshell and blister packs, there won't be any packaging left!"

'SALE! One Million Dollars Per Bike!!' by saying, 'I figure that if I sell just one, I can retire.'

Man stands in front of rows of kangaroos next to a sign that reads "Final Clearance - Entire stock of kanagroos".

'Maturity: the instant-degratification phase of life.'

"Let's just get through the first aisle...then we'll discuss your impulse buying."

Pirate trying on parrots.

'Bag? Any vouchers? Like a packer? If you have two of those... What type of apples are these?'

Santa checking out sleigh beds.

Great moments in shopping

"Back here in 30 minutes?"

We Offer Fast, Friendly Or Quality Service! "So, which one do you want?"

"Let's see now; rat's gizzard, bats wings, eye of newt....oh, yes. And cornflakes!"

I'm sorry sir, store rules. No 'Stairway to Heaven'.

'I can't tell you what I spent for reasons of national security.'

If you don't see what you want, buy something you don't want!

Shop signs.

"I'm not sure. Maybe it's my wife's butt size I'm thinking of!"

The 29p Shop

"So if I'm to understand you correctly, this 'engineered athletic footwear' with its 'extended torsion system' is also a sneaker?"

"Footwear's upstairs, Sir"

'It's you.'

Fresh milk - Self service

Missing Person: Last seen shopping

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