Shopkeeper Sagas Gifts

'I don't know about you, but I could do with a break.'

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

SALE

"Our business is based on breakthroughs."

"The only thing that's not gone up is the pound."

Stationery Shop

'I'm sorry, sir, but our happy hour doesn't start for another fifteen minutes.'

"I'd say business was brisk."

Where Ignorance is Bliss.

SupermarketAwful Market.

Modern History: Last Year/Last Month/Last Week/Yesterday.

'It's the same EVERY year... 5 minutes to midnight; victims are all male, and they're carrying large sums of money.'

'Buy two pounds and I'll throw in the sword.'

"Are you mad with us, Mrs. Bimmelman?"

Smoke and Mirrors: Harold couldn't work out why his new store wasn't getting any customers.

'Where do you keep the elbow-grease?'

'Uh-oh.'

"Ah! I see you've found a cold beer to your liking, sir."

"...And our 'Holiday Scented' candle smells just like credit cards."

It's an I-O-Ewe.

After the latest pay bonus and benefit awards you've won, I've decided to join you on the shop floor.

Organic foods stand manned by stallholder using fly spray.

'You did want him wrapped, didn't you?'

Marketing - Learn from customers' buying patterns...

'But what do you sell?'

Down on Her.

"Ooh look, the high street's evolved to survive!"

Mom $50 Pop $35

Boomerang Sale! - No Returns

How much would you take off for cash?

Smirking or Non-smirking

A relevant sign for the shopkeeper's predicament.

Books: Closed Down Due To Exasperation.

'Can we move the beef jerky a smidge and display our organic cleanser?'

'Death, where is thy Sting?'