Senior Giggler Gifts

'Did we ever hit menopause?'

"Awww man. My nuts are so old they're wrinkled." "Tell me about it."

'I'm afraid he's at that age when he's into everything!'

STRIP Hambone: Computer company job interview

"Sometimes I wish I could just jump into the dryer and come out wrinkle-free!"

'You can come out, Marmaduke. I was just kidding about putting lipstick on you.'

2pm meet your Creator

'I can't hire you, but I can sell you some stock in the company.'

Moses' first encounter with the burning bush didn't go well.

'God sees everything? You mean He channel surfs?'

'Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, feel sorry for the people who have to work with you.'

'Man, I'm bombing,'

'I'm with the band.'

I am one with stupid.

"Well, you can tell that David Silva that I said you definitely don't have cooties, Carolyn."

'Dicing with Death'

Confession Ratings.

'Finally some good news about out new vitamin pill!'

'Say, how can I convert this FAT file into a nice and small JPG?'

'This note from your teacher says you're doing great for a six year old. Doesn't she know you're fifteen?'

"I'd let her go, but she's so good with the kids."

Dead & Breakfast.

"This gown just ain't big enough for the both of us."

'My next song is about a singer who should get into another line of work.'

You didn't tell me it was iTheatre...

"Where's the Viagra?!" "Where's the fire escape?!"

'Everytime there's a thaw, I lose a lot of weight.'

'He's a great dog...a bit of a drooler though.'

"Not It!"

"He's so cute! What kind of dog is that?"

"I'm not taking any chances. . ."

"My wife took up walkin' a mile a day five years ago. Haven't seen her since!" "Lucky son of a..."

'I think the idea of an online dating service for seniors is fine. I just don't think we should name it, 'TimesRunningOut.com.''