Self-proclaimed Park Ranger Gifts

This is your park - get busy and clean up the doggie-doo!

Bitchbark Canoe

Playing Fetch.

'What the... MOM! This isn't deer! It's a yucky tourist again!!'

"You've been so good to us all these years. Is there anything we can do to repay you?"

"You do realize you can't take that one home."

'He just burst into my campsite, and broke my banjo!'

"You should be sniffed, and often, by someone who knows how."

Piracy on a boating lake

How about going easy on the carbs

"I do miss trees but I don't miss the raking."

"This is so fun - I've been wagging my tail so much my cheeks hurt!"

"Boy, that's what I call a maze."

'Will you please stop feeding the pigeons?!'

'Look at that! Peanuts!'

"Let's hear some of that scout master wisdom now, sir!"

Beaver tower

Dog tries to obey No Dog sign

'Congratulations! Our yard's been declared a national wilderness area!'

'Sorry, but I'm arresting you for being in possession of an endangered wild coho salmon.'

'Hey, want to go to the beach ...I mean ...the birdbath?'

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

Garden pond: mosquito breeding ground

'Don't worry about getting lost, folks. These trails are all well marked. . . if I do say so myself.'

"Nice try, but I know a squirrel in a bird suit when I see one."

Hiking sign - Stop, pause, play, skip forward, skip back

Even for a mountain goat he's good.

Devil's Tower Park. Ernie, this nice ranger has offered to show us the basement gift shop.

'We're a protected species and an endangered speices, but when I see a person, I don't know if he's protecting us or endangering us.'

The Canoga Forest - coming soon: The Conoga Desert.

"Are we done yet? ... Because I'm turning around now."

'Surely they don't expect us to carry around THAT sort of money?'

Danger Falling Leaves

Malfunctioning geyser

Life's a Bench.