Park-goer Humorist Gifts

"Here! Let me get you all in!"

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

Skiing.

"You should be sniffed, and often, by someone who knows how."

Piracy on a boating lake

How about going easy on the carbs

"Boy, that's what I call a maze."

'Will you please stop feeding the pigeons?!'

"This is so fun - I've been wagging my tail so much my cheeks hurt!"

Irritable trowel syndrome.

"Nice try, but I know a squirrel in a bird suit when I see one."

"Well if it comes to that you're not exactly Mr Wonderful."

"Ma'am! Stop spoiling the birds!"

"If the meeting goes on for longer than scheuled...I'm prepared!"

Mountain climbers, "Someone's been here before us."

Psychiatry in the Park

'You sure complain a lot for someone who says he loves nature.'

"Only 150 kids? - Have you considered fertility treatment?"

LOOK BHIND U!

'Clayton enjoys living on the edge,'

"It's unusual to see them reading this time of year."

"I did, boss, I swear, I buried him myself."

"Have you farted. . . ?"

"Perhaps I should have warned you...They really don't like wholemeal bread."

Fork in the trail.

"Yes, I'm the wise man who lives on the top of the mountain. And believe me, the surcharge for the pizza delivery service is insane!"

In summer, the nut-jobs buried by squirrels the previous fall begin to sprout.

"Have you ever actually seen a chicken cross the road?"

'If a bear attacks and I have to play dead I want it to be as convincing as possible!'

Ranger has sign saying 'Do not feed the bears'. Bear crosses out sign to read 'Feed the bears'.

This is not what I had in mind when I joined the Council!

'This bread's actually meant for multiple ducks.'

"I love the way it blurs the boundary between inside and out."