Self-love Champion Pillows

"Do you promise to love and comfort yourself, on good days and bad, for richer, for poorer, in weight gain and loss, as long as you shall live?"

Be Different and Fabulous.

"Remember how I've always had a hard time asking for help?"

"Are you OK hun?"

Woman looking into a mirror

"The third little pig is now a menopausal porker. I hate these hairs on my chinny chin chin."

Three card brag - I'm great! I'm really handsome & I'm very rich.

' You're wonderful.' 'I know.'

Don't Take No For an Answer

"Does this make me think I look good?"

"Who cares what little kids think? What's important is that you believe in yourself."

Me when by BDD shows up

The universe that has me at the center of it is my kind of universe!

Mankini - One size fits all.

"You've got to learn to love yourself. Start by 'Friending" yourself on Facebook."

"I'm diagnosing selfie-steem issues."

'I have way too much respect and dignity to dye the grey out of my hair... so instead could you all just put on these brown-tinted glasses.'

'It's Always 'Good Dog'—Never 'Great Dog.'

"Would it be possible to speak with the personality that pays the bills."

"Gracie, can you make me soar?"

"I hope I'm single for Valentine's because only I fully know my worth in chocolate."

'I'm at the age when everything Mother Nature gave Father Time is taking away...'

"Everybody's just a teensy bit in love with me. How about yourself?"

"Would you like your real size or one that artificially inflates your ego?"

"On a personal note, my wife, Ann, and I have agreed to separate, as I've fallen in love with the sound of my own voice."

'See, I told you you were beautiful.'

Self Love Witch

"If you love yourself then you'll never be alone."

"I got a bonus for the first time in years. Would it be selfish to spend it on myself instead of on Christmas gifts?"

"Whenever I'm feeling down, I throw myself a parade."

Narcissus discovers t-shirts

"One nice thing about being an amoeba, nobody ever tells you you're out of shape!"

Narcissus

'You know, it's not good for kids' self-esteem to keep harping on about this 'naughty or nice' stuff.'