Sedentary Lifestyle Enthusiasts Gifts

"The first of a new species? Or last of an old one? I sometimes wonder. . ."

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

"Doesn't seem like 6 hours on the couch, but you can't argue with a lethargy tracker."

"Chair looks couch potato friendly!"

"That's actually my phone. When I answer my calls I get a little bit of a workout."

'The doctor said you need more exercise, so I've hidden the remote control.'

'Too long at his desk...we're going need surgery to cut him free.'

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

"Well, sometimes we take the dogs for a walk...which puts our fitness level at approximately that of an 80-year-old couple."

We never fly anywhere anymore.

"When you are done exercising your finger, the cat would like to talk to you!"

"Remember me? I'm your running shoes. Remember what running is?"

Use it or lose it.

'American, idle.'

'According to this, my coffin should be facing the south side of the crypt.'

'Fishing, Al?! You cancelled our hunting trip to go fishing!! God, it's like I don't even know you anymore!'

'Hmm...Sofa sores. This is becoming increasingly common in fat blokes.'

"Obsessive complacent disorder"

Reality television programme - showing infinite regression

"I'm searching my family history in hopes of finding some generational trauma or institutionalized oppression that would explain whole I'm failing all my courses."

"The very thought of exercise does that to him. I guess that's why it's called cross training."

"Just back from lunch . . . I needed to stretch my legs."

"So, let's see what your fitness band says today."

"I can't tell if you're at work or at home."

"Whay do they think about all day?"

"I'm not sure that lifting the remote control is what they meant by 'taking exercise'!"

Modern Childhood

"Will I be able to carry on not doing any exercise?"

Girl on couch considers channel-hopping to be a sport

"It seems like everything these days is new and improved. . . except you."

"That corn on your foot is beginning to look nasty."

"We have a new exercise routine. I moved the refrigerator to the basement and the TV to the attic."

'It's repetitive strain injury - try using the thumb on your other hand for the television remote.'