Sedentary Lifestyle Critic Gifts

'It's true that gernerally speaking, work space is getting smaller, but in your case, that hasn't happened.'

"You need to lose some weight. Go and see if you can find the remote control."

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

"5 chocolate brownies, 3 banana muffins, 4 caramel cookies and one cappuccino - skinny."

"Doesn't seem like 6 hours on the couch, but you can't argue with a lethargy tracker."

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

Junk art/ food/ tv/ music/ amusements/ novels/ views/ life.

"Chair looks couch potato friendly!"

"You are still here."

"That's actually my phone. When I answer my calls I get a little bit of a workout."

'The doctor said you need more exercise, so I've hidden the remote control.'

"What> Fitness isn't a destination, it's a way of life."

'I try and humour him...it's the only exercise he gets!'

'Too long at his desk...we're going need surgery to cut him free.'

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

"... with a side of brown rice, right. And can the delivery guy stop at the pharmacy and pick up my prescription?"

"Well, sometimes we take the dogs for a walk...which puts our fitness level at approximately that of an 80-year-old couple."

Advanced Zen for Couch Potatoes: Earl becomes One with his Lazy-Boy.

We never fly anywhere anymore.

Eventual Motion Machine

"When you are done exercising your finger, the cat would like to talk to you!"

"Remember me? I'm your running shoes. Remember what running is?"

Use it or lose it.

'American, idle.'

"I'm still thirsty. Maybe I've got leaky gut syndrome."

'I had to report it. Based on your lifestyle, your heart attack was premeditated.'

'Hmm...Sofa sores. This is becoming increasingly common in fat blokes.'

Obesity: Mechanical & Biological.

"Just back from lunch . . . I needed to stretch my legs."

Reality television programme - showing infinite regression

"Obsessive complacent disorder"

"If I ever get my own business, I'm going to practice the Golden Rule."

Rodney kicked off his fitness regime by buying a heavier remote control...this was not enough.

"So, let's see what your fitness band says today."