Secret Scale Stepper Pillows

Secretive Weigh In.

'Nothing impacts my lifestyle choices more than a veterinarian with a scale.'

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

Critisize your weight.

'I know we're inchworms, but let's get into the spirit of this! Change is good!'

"Hold on, hun... I'm just saying, losing four ounces in a month is better than gaining four ounces in a month!"

Woman weighing herself while holding balloons

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

"They're going to be tough shoes to fill."

Woman is shocked at seeing her weight, she doesn't realise that her dog is also on the scales.

Scales

Fat man on scales.

Joe's Weight Gain: 'Hey, Victoria...I like this diet you told me about yesterday...I just lost 2 more while we've been talking.'

The not so secret life of Walter Mitty

'Will we ever get a morning-after pill for over-eating?'

'Washington has wooden teeth? -- how did you find that out?', 'It came out in conversation.'

The World's best Camouflage Store.

Shrink

Step aerobics

Cathy decides to remain standing on the scale until she loses weight.

Paul was certain he had the largest pumpkin, until he discovered he was the smallest man.

'I'm afraid I can't accept that excuse Mrs Hart. It isn't possible to inhale second hand calories.'

"I do diet...between snacks."

I only weigh 95 kilograms...That's 210...in pounds!

Fat lady standing on a weighing machine. Its print out says 'I Quit!'.

"Whoa, I guess dad and mom didn’t send Scraps off to live on a farm after all."

'The other foot also Mrs Zipsky!'

Lady Justice using metric scales.

'I want you to lose 50 pounds, and then tell me how you did it.'

"Relax dear. You haven't 'put on a ridiculous amount of weight'. You've just forgotten to take off your armour."

'It doesn't matter, Mr. Katz — you're overweight standard or metric.'

'You need to go on a diet. Your spare tyres are getting spare tyres!'

"I got one of those new crystal ball fitness trackers-- it tells me all my future steps."

Using balloons to weigh less.

'We've got it narrowed down to between three and twenty-three pounds.'