Scale Stepper Pillows

'I want you to lose 50 pounds, and then tell me how you did it.'

'The other foot also Mrs Zipsky!'

Woman weighing herself while holding balloons

Two weighing machines, one speaks your weight and the other lies about it.

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

'Read it now...now!'

'I'm afraid I can't accept that excuse Mrs Hart. It isn't possible to inhale second hand calories.'

'Dad! - Mum's cheating again!'

'Dang!'

Fat man on scales.

Objects On Scale Are Heavier Than They Appear

I only weigh 95 kilograms...That's 210...in pounds!

Scales

"Both feet on please..."

"I expect those extra pounds are the huge weight of this diet book."

"And Maureen's lost...nothing! Let's have a big chair for Maureen!"

"You have to give up this devil-may-care fattitude."

"It says, ' ... can't breathe ... get off!'"

"Yup, that pound cake did weigh a pound."

'I've had it with dieting! -- I lost two pounds last week and nobody noticed!'

'Finally!'

"Hold on, hun... I'm just saying, losing four ounces in a month is better than gaining four ounces in a month!"

'It appears your undisciplined dieting has bottomed out.'

Fat lady standing on a weighing machine. Its print out says 'I Quit!'.

'I'm on a one month diet... So far I've lost 14 days...'

Lots of people are lousy at counting calories... and they have the figures to prove it!

'I'm down another twenty pounds!'

I've jumped on the high fiber bandwagon. Fortunately, it makes frequent stops.

Joe's Weight Gain: 'Hey, Victoria...I like this diet you told me about yesterday...I just lost 2 more while we've been talking.'

Using balloons to weigh less.

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

Critisize your weight.

'Nothing impacts my lifestyle choices more than a veterinarian with a scale.'

Secretive Weigh In.

'I know we're inchworms, but let's get into the spirit of this! Change is good!'