Seasonal Humor Expert Gifts

Help! Have to pay back a big world bank loan.

"Little help?"

"It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller." "Yeah, how come you haven't said 'Merry Christmas' yet?" "Oh, that’s because I was hoping to provoke everyone who’s upset about the so-called 'war on Christmas' to spend all their time on hold waiting to castigate me. That way, all the normal people who don’t think Christmas is just another chance to play the victim can open their gifts in peace." "You're welcome, America." "Why haven't you played 'Jingle Bells' yet?"

"No, Doris, not implants!"

Santa Claus You Are Welcome.

"I love November - the crunch of leaves underfoot... the crisp air... the holiday markets..." "... it getting dark by mid-afternoon..." "Okay, that's less enjoyable."

"We're freaky February hares, the mad march ones have vanished due to global warming."

Futile Little Snow Shoveler Guy Snow Globe

'Summer's over and it's time to fall in!'

Pre-Winter Ennui-'Hon, did you have the furnace checked?'

"UK government aren’t budging boss. Sole supplier or not under the new procurement regulations our new contract has to have three KPIs..."

"If you want to play fetch with the dog, throw your own @#&% arm."

'It's a snow mobile.'

"So, are you predicting an early spring?"

"I love this time of year."

Snooze Alarm for Mole.

"You can't be serious about all these travel expenses in December!"

'Relax, it's purely a seasonally affected disorder.'

Snowman and stickmen losing arms

"Santa's elves have to eat, you know."

"You have ice water in your veins."

'He wants to return some shade trees because they stopped working in November.'

Santa with a boy on his knee:' I've got your 300 dollars. Did you bring your Mom and Dad's social security numbers and password information?'

Christmas Socks

"We've decided to cut back and have Christmas every other year."

Open Mike Night Presents Sadie Cohen in: Changing Seasons. Does life affirm with coming fall? Leaved hit the ground, men huddle. Smashing each other over a ball. Wrestling around in a puddle. Huh? In this potpourri of hulky sights, one image is hardly the least, sir. So many changes, so many nights ... to see Eli Manning's keister. The bard of NY Giants football. Beautiful. Disgusting.

Snowman Romance

Night of the Living Reindeer

Santa's Second Stringers.

'So is this your lazy days of summer, or are we still working on spring?'

"Did you get some work done?"

'I love crocuses. They seem to defy the winter snow to let you know spring is coming.'

"This is the only time of the year when we get to hit the children."

"I'm going to need to make multiple stops."

The Four Seasonings.