Scripture Story Lover Gifts

"A plague of frogs? Awesome!"

"Meet the scribe"

"Too 'Book of Genesis'?"

"Once upon a time, there was a princess who wasn't about to take anyone's sh*t."

Kid to mom: 'Tell me again about the time you helped fortress a city, subdue hostile fire and got home and baked us all raspberry strudels.'

"Hang on, isn't this the second pair of zebras we've had today?"

"I've told you before one at each end!"

'You say the ARKS are NOT two by two?'

"If this Goliath bloke is as big as they say, I can just hang around the forest until he's gone."

"I just never 'think I can' anymore."

"I'm trying to forget a pussycat."

"That dream catcher may be working a little too well."

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

Little Known Moments In History

'Hello Colin, I'm Arthur, any idea what all the fuss is about?'

'Look, I never said salvation would be PRETTY!'

Noah's Ark/Single's Cruise

Toys were me: lessons learned never growing up

Fyodor Dostoevsky

'Why did Moses wander in the desert for forty years?'

"Now here's a tale that'll make you hair stand on end"

Queen says: 'Mirror, mirror, on the wall ... 'It's all so subjective' is not an acceptable answer.'

'You brought gold? I thought we agreed to a twenty dollar limit?'

Regifts of the Magi

'And all the executive board members got lovely big payouts and lived happily ever after!'

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

BRAND-NEW OMG-STORY

Rapunzel's short-lived career in the restaurant business.

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations became savvy consumers, then they lived reasonably contented forever after.'

'I never saw a tracer bullet that I didn't admire for color, clarity and swiftness.'

'I thought you were going for a walk in the woods. Your porridge has been cooling on the table for hours! '

''Tree of Knowledge,' eh? - Has it been fact-checked?'

Fairy tale

"The Ugly Duckling didn't know why he was so attracted to swan culture."

'Rapunzel, Rapunzel! Let down your hair extensions.'