Scissor Savant Gifts

'Just a minute, I forgot something.'

Warning, ski season abruptly ends here.

"Be creative...!"

The dumpster code - find something, leave something.

"I think you'll find the pen is writier than the sword."

That's supposed to say garage sale!

'You could do that.' I did

Girl on a giant pair of scissors.

Girl on a giant pair of scissors.

Trawling for Fish.

Computer grabs man and tells him to stop it.

'I'll need the large blade on this lawyer...I'm performing a radical crapendectomy.'

Haircuts

Footbalistas - A group of people passionately dedicated to the all-day broadcast of professional sports."

"It's not a first edition, but it's from Moses' workshop."

Self-portraits

"Those aren't just any old doodles, Ms. Jones, they're notes for my graphic novel!"

Dueling marionettes.

'It's commendable that you only ate one slice of pizza, but when you're only cutting it in half...'

Jesus Saves

'You're going Cross-country skiing? DO you know just how big a country this is to cross?'

'This marriage proposal is quite flattering, but why exactly are you called a 'Black Widow'?'

Skate! Skate! Skate!

Afternoon crafts

"Today, in Metalwork, we learned how to cut a slit in the heads of screws."

Electric motorcycles catch fire in Cuba

"Profession?"

Relay racers passing money instead of baton.

"Blah blah blah. . ."

Grand Opening! I wish someone had told me those weren't for haircuts.

'Scroll down a little...'

"Do you want it parted in the middle?"

' No, it's 'I' before 'E', except after 'C'!'

Welcome to Silicon Valley

'You're a cartoonist, I bet.'