School Subject Strategist Gifts

'Can I hand in my report tomorrow. Ms. D'Amato? I haven't finished reading the book. I've been too busy coloring it.'

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

Do your research!

School. Report Card. You couldn't name the presidents and flunked history? Yeah -- It's not what you know, it's who you know.

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

'No! Forging a note from your parents does not count as creative writing!'

"How was work?"

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

"By reading my note, you acknowledge having read and agreed to my Privacy Policy and Terms of Use."

'Not just my homework - The dog chewed up my whole LAPTOP!'

"Maybe if I make myself inconspicuous I won't be called on."

"Getting into a fight is one thing, but did you have to get into a class-clearing brawl?"

How did you get your parents to send you to Costa Rica this summer, Ingrid? By almost flunking Spanish. That's dire. Hardly! I'll party and practice my accent. Next year�remind me to bring my French grade down. Si!

Good Luck!

'You have to STUDY for tests, dummy -- you can't just put a memory stick in your ear!'

Will eat your homework for $.

"In my class, I'm not interested in grades. I'm interested in you becoming a better person!"

"If animals can be cloned, why can't homework be cloned?"

"I'm thinking that now is a good time to start those tutoring sessions."

'Simple case of gravity, mom.'

'It wouldn't be right if I did your homework for you!' 'At least you could try!'

"All right, what's it going to take to make this homework go away?"

A man sitting in the grass reading

"We were running late, so my mom faxed me to school."

'First she called my mother, and then she called Santa.'

'Stewart, why is the handwriting on your mom's last two attendance notes different?'

'...All profits are local.'

'To be honest I only became a vicar to get my children into the C of E school.'

'You're being evacuated to a better catchment area.'

'That's the bell for round two.'

2000 words was tough, but doable. Billy would play the picture paints a 1000 words card, twice!

'I don't know what made Ms. Doan think I was running in the hall.'

"Mom, no more apples for teacher. It looks like bribery."

'I don't have a dog, but I do have a dog app that eats my homework.'

Kid sheltering from rain inside a vault box.